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I am great!
Do you ever get the feeling that your children seem to have commandeered your life? Do you feel that your old-self (and self-esteem) is now a distant memory and that everything you do now is for others?
Here we list 10 mantras you can say to yourself, to help you feel on top life again.
I will look after myself
It’s easy now you have the man and the baby, to not be so rigorous about your beauty regime. But if you can manage to look in the mirror every day and say a few 'mummy mantras' while you brush your hair, you are on your way to keeping yourself looking and feeling good.
I will focus on me
Give yourself some time off to say your mantras, 3-5 minutes is not a big ask. The more mantras you can think of, the longer you will stay in front of the mirror.
While focusing on yourself, you will realise what is important to you, and that you deserve to take the time to include a moisturising routine in your day.
I will get out the door on time
If you are normally a punctual person, you may feel frustrated with yourself after having kids if you find you are constantly running late. Build up your confidence again by setting your clock back 15 minutes, give yourself a little grace time, and focus, it can be done.
Tip: Have a spare bag packed near the door, filled with all necessities (nappies, bottle of water, hat etc) so you can make a quick exit, if need be.
I will learn to ignore and run
Don’t attempt to tackle any behavioural issues if you can not control the outcome. By choosing which battles you 'engage' in, you are sending a clear message that when you say something, what you say goes.
Disciplining an over tired child, who is not going to listen, or if you are not able to follow through with any threats you make (as a consequence of bad behaviour) then don’t engage, save it for next time, and just learn to ignore them and head for the door.
I will ignore sibling squabbles
"Turn a deaf ear and a blind eye to as much squabbling as you possibly can," advises Dr Christopher Green, author of Toddler Taming. "It's amazing how few fights take place without an audience!"
I will not sweat the small stuff
If you're stuck on picking up on every single thing your child does wrong, you'll create a child who has no faith in himself, and if he can't ever please you, he'll stop trying.
Put yourself in their shoes – if it is harmless play, just play along.
I will be in the photo
You may not like having your photo taken under normal circumstances, but when it comes to the pictorial memories for your children, make sure you are in as many as possible, so they can be passed down from generation to generation.
I will re-establish a healthy life
Decided that you want to start living a life you're in control of? The trick is to start something small that you're keen to start or re-establish. It could be swimming laps once a week, or taking a brisk walk after dinner on a Tuesday, or shopping for fresh veggies from the farmers market on the weekend.
Having a little time to look after your health, no matter how small will help re-establish yourself worth.
I will move more
Research shows that people, who move more increasing their physical activity in some way, feel better about themselves.
Write down some ways you could fit more movement into your week. You could try to park further away at the shops, and take the stairs instead of the lift.
I am appreciated
You might not get great bunches of flowers everyday (who does) and if your partner is not great at giving vocal compliments, there are some days when you will feel totally un-appreciated. On those days, remember that whenever he thinks of your child, you can guarantee he appreciates your excellent parenting skills, and of course your children themselves will one day be the best they can be because of you.