From MAFS to dad of two: Cam Merchant on parenthood, love, and life with two small kids
“Being the dad to these two beautiful boys means everything. They don’t know it, but they saved my life.”
Cam Merchant and Jules Robinson first locked eyes as they walked down the aisle on Married At First Sight Australia season six. The fan-favourite couple made history in November 2019 when they became the first pair from the show to tie the knot for real.
Their heartfelt vows, exchanged in Sydney, were even televised in A Current Affair’s Married At First Sight Wedding Special: Cam and Jules.
Fast forward to October 2020, and their love story took on a new chapter with the arrival of their first child, Oliver Chase. Then, in July 2024, their hearts (and hands!) became even fuller as they welcomed their second baby boy into the world.
“Carter James Merchant ❤️,” Jules shared, announcing their newest addition to Instagram. “You are just perfection. We have a beautiful, healthy boy!! 23/7/24.”
Bounty Parents sat down with Cam Merchant to chat about life as a dad of two and the joys of raising his little duo.
Cam Merchant on baby Carter, big brother Ollie and fatherhood
What’s it like being a dad to two boys? Even though they’re still young, have you noticed any similarities or differences in their personalities so far?
Busy, magnificent, rewarding, challenging, entertaining and as I’m answering this, Carter is spitting his lunch out at me, so just hilarious and memorable and I love every moment of it.
Yes, both boys are completely different in personalities. Ollie is one hundred miles an hour, loves his animals and dinosaurs. Carter is very chilled. Smiley and so happy and he doesn’t know it yet, but he loves his cricket and footy.
How does Ollie find being a big brother? Has there been any sibling rivalry or jealousy between him and Carter?
Ollie absolutely adores Carter and loves being a big brother, almost to the stage where he smothers him too much with cuddles. There’s some potential underlying jealousy but he’s a very good big brother and loves him and Carter idolises everything that Ollie does.
Cam Merchant on what fatherhood means to him
What does being a dad mean to you, and how has it changed you as a person?
Being a dad represents so much more than just right now; it represents over 10 years ago when I was struggling with my own mental health and life. The thought of having a family was the one thing that kept me going, so it gives me genuine purpose every day. Being the dad to these two beautiful boys means everything. They don’t know it, but they saved my life – having them one day kept me going, gave me hope, and kept me working toward this moment. And here we are. So proud. My perspective on what’s really important continues to change every single day.
Can you describe one of the most special moments you’ve had with Ollie or Carter that really made you feel in awe of being a dad?
So many special and memorable moments. I mean, both of them coming into the world right next to Jules and watching her give birth naturally was just the most incredible experience. I’m very fortunate to have witnessed them stand up, crawl for the first time, and hear their first laugh. But one moment that stands out to me so beautifully happened the other day. I tell Ollie that I love him every day, and he always replies with, “I love you too, Dad.” But for the first time, without me saying it, he came up to me on his own and said, “I love you, Dad.” It was such a special, beautiful moment I hadn’t experienced before. It certainly makes all the mess and chaos well worth it, that’s for sure.
Quality time with your boys
What are some of your favourite activities to do with Ollie?
We love to explore around our home, as we have many animals and wildlife that surround us, and we enjoy learning more about them.
How do you spend quality time with Carter – any special moments with him that stand out for you?
Early mornings when he wakes are special. The house is quiet, and we just go outside, watch the sunrise and the birds, then play on the carpet, cuddle, and laugh.
Have you introduced Ollie to Monster Trucks yet? What do you think his reaction will be when he sees them in action for the first time?
What’s funny is I picked him up from preschool the other day, and as I walked in, he was actually playing with monster trucks. It was the perfect moment to tell him that we’re going to see a Monster Truck show, and his first reaction was, “Will there be a T-Rex monster truck?” So, the action itself—bang, crash—will be phenomenal!
Do you consider yourself to be an adrenaline junkie – and do you think Ollie will grow up to be one?
I love a fast-paced adrenaline experience, that’s for sure, and I have no doubt Ollie loves it too. Also, dinosaurs, cars, animals, and heaps of action – he’s all about it, non-stop. I would love a second of calm at any stage, to be honest. Haha!
Cam Merchant on parenting two kids under five
What have been some of the biggest challenges of having two kids under the age of five?
Bedtime routines… still haven’t nailed them, and I would love to sleep in my own bed in the next 12 months, if possible. Haha!
How do you and Jules manage the chaos?
It starts with a hug, breathing together to begin, telling each other it’s all going to be okay, and then dividing and conquering.
How do you juggle the needs of a 4-year-old with an 8 month-old, especially when both need your attention at the same time?
I think it starts with honesty and the reality that we realise we’re never going to get it right all the time. Both children will need us, and we try to split our time and juggle as best we can. But we also have to accept that we can’t be perfect. As much as we’d love to be nailing it every time, the reality – both for us and for any other parent – is that it’s difficult. We need to be easy on ourselves and remember we’re doing our best with the best intentions.
How has having two kids under five changed your routine or approach to parenting?
I had about 9 months where Jules was pregnant, and Ollie was sleeping through the night, which allowed me to get up at any time, start my day with the gym, and then dive into the day once Ollie headed off to school. It felt like everything was falling back into order again – until, boom, just like that, I’m back to 1 a.m., 2 a.m., 3 a.m., 5 a.m. feeds and can’t step out at any stage.
So, your time, emotions, patience, and mental wellness have to be managed according to what your child, your family, and yourself need.
All of a sudden, the days aren’t as productive with work and projects because you have a beautiful little human to look after full-time. And you have to remember, that’s okay if nothing gets done. The most important thing is that my little new mate feels safe and happy – that’s the best job in the world.
What’s the funniest or most chaotic moment you’ve experienced with both boys so far?
Travelling with kids is always fun, especially long-haul flights. We did Thailand and Bali with both boys over Christmas, and there’s every emotion you can imagine. At one point, Jules and I were in the middle of Phuket airport with Carter throwing up and soiling himself, thinking he had food poisoning, while Ollie was overtired. That combination wasn’t fun, but we just embraced it. We changed Carter right there in the middle of the airport, surrounded by thousands of people, while laughing at the situation because we didn’t know what else to do.
Turns out he was just teething badly, but boy, was it a mess! And you realise, if you can get through that, you can get through anything. Ahhh, the joys… You just have to embrace them.
With two young kids, how do you find time for yourself and your partner?
Our communication has always been open and honest since we first met, so we always make sure to find time to tell each other how we’re feeling and what’s going on. This helps us manage each other’s emotions and provide support when needed.
We share diaries so we know what’s in each other’s schedule, but we also set goals at the start of the year to prioritise and intentionally make time for date nights, date days, lunches, and time together. This includes knowing it’s okay to have babysitters or parents look after the kids, and prioritising time for us. When we are both okay, our family life flourishes together.
What’s one piece of advice you’d give to parents who are transitioning from one child to two?
Understand your strengths as a parent and communicate with your partner to act on them for the benefit of your children. What works best for each of you will ultimately be best for your kids and your relationship.
For example, my superpower is waking up and getting back to sleep, while Jules – once she’s awake – stays awake for the day. So, my role is night feeds, whereas Jules is an incredible organiser, handling schedules and planning what the kids need to do. It works well as a team.
Continue to learn about your child, their needs, and their emotions. Meltdowns are inevitable, but if you’re educating yourself along the way, it generally helps – and sometimes feels like you have a cheat code to work with. But at the same time, keep trusting your parenting intuition to give your children what they need.
Embrace the mess and let go of the expectation that your house needs to be pristine and clean. Just let it be – it’s not what it used to be. Don’t put the pressure on yourself to be perfect all the time.
It is what it is – just enjoy the moment. It’s so true: time goes faster than you can imagine. So, as much as we love capturing memories, put down the phone and just be with your kids. It’s the most beautiful thing in the world, and they feel every bit of it.
