Separated or divorced? Here’s how to navigate the kids over the holidays
It can be a wonderful and difficult time for families.
By Breanna Deakes, Associate at Australian Family Lawyers
The school holiday period is both a wonderful and difficult time for families. For those parents who work, annual leave at this time of year can be an issue. For those struggling with the separation and/or divorce this period can be troubling and triggering.
Many families will take advantage of the school holidays and want to travel. So how does this all work when you are separated or divorced? Well, that depends on many factors.
If you have Court Orders or a Parenting Plan
If you have Court Orders for parenting in force, those will need to be followed unless any changes are agreed between you and the other parent. The same applies for Parenting Plans. Parenting Plans, while not legally enforceable, should be followed unless otherwise agreed.
If you want to deviate from your Court Orders or Parenting Plan and there is no agreement from the other parent, you should consider obtaining legal advice. There can be serious consequences for non-compliance of a Court Order.
Breanna Deakes is an Associate at Australian Family Lawyers.
If there are no Court Orders or Parenting Plans
If you are separated or divorced and have not yet discussed parenting arrangements for the holidays this year, then now is the time to have the conversation.
Each the year, the Parenting Order Application “cut off” date is by 4:00pm on the second Friday of November. This year it is Friday 10 November 2023.
Applications filed after this date are not guaranteed to be heard before Christmas. You can seek to file an urgent application. However, because “Christmas is close, and we cannot agree” is unlikely to be considered an urgent application and the usual urgent application considerations apply.
The other difficulty you face is that parties seeking to apply for parenting orders must attempt family dispute resolution (mediation) before filing an application unless an exemption applies. This process can be slow, and usually a private family dispute resolution practitioner can assist you quicker.
There is no law or rule on how the arrangements for holiday periods should operate.
However, there are many ways families choose to do this. Each family is different and has different needs so you will need to come up with a mutually acceptable arrangement.
It really depends on how the usual spend time arrangements occur and what you consider works for your family on special occasions and school holidays.
Always keep in mind the best interests of the children when making these arrangements.
If you are separated or divorced and have not yet discussed parenting arrangements for the holidays, then you best get a move on.
Travelling with children when you are separated or divorced
With the school holidays approaching, families will be taking the opportunity to venture interstate and overseas.
Again, if there is a parenting order which details how and when you can travel, this should be followed. If you need to deviate from the order, then it must be agreed in writing by the other parent or by further consent Order. We recommend any variations to Orders be agreed in writing, such as section in the 64D Parenting Plan that varies the existing Orders.
If there is no agreement, you should not travel. Any travel which has not been agreed could make you the subject of a recovery order (meaning the Federal Police will be directed to return the children to the other parent). If consent is being unreasonably withheld, you should obtain legal advice specific to your circumstances.
A reassuring book can help your child
With social work qualifications and a master’s degree in children’s literature, author Debra Tidball understands the vital role attachment plays in child development.
In a world where many parents are separated from their children for periods of time due to work and/ or living arrangements, a sense of attachement can feel stretched.
Debra’s children’s book, Anchored is a reassuring book reminding children that the love they share with their parents/ caregivers can sustain time apart: they are firmly anchored in each other’s hearts.
“As a parent it made me think about the sustaining power of love – how holding someone in your heart can make you more courageous, and make the world seem like a better, brighter place despite not being together.”
In this sensitive tale, Tug and Ship are connected by bonds of love despite being oceans apart.
Australian Family Lawyers has expert advice on hand to explain the best way divorced and separated parents can successfully negotiate travel arrangements during the holiday season whether they’re travelling locally or internationally. Please contact us for advice specific to your circumstances.
