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She’s a mum-of-five already, but for Jools Oliver the dream of baby number six is one full of longing.
Sadly, the attempts to increase her family with husband, Chef Jamie Oliver have resulted in heartbreak so far. The 46-year-old recently revealed that since giving birth to her youngest son, River in 2016, she has suffered three miscarriages, the most recent one just weeks ago.
Always open about the heartache of infant loss, Jools has often broached the subject of the five miscarriages she has been through during her 20 year marriage to 45-year-old Jamie. Most recently, on their wedding anniversary last month, Jools paid tribute to their “five little stars in the sky”.
Childhood sweethearts, Jamie and Jools have been through five miscarriages in their 20 year marriage.
Speaking on the Made By Mammas podcast, host Zoe Hardman noted that Jools had been “pining for a sixth child” before her 47th birthday next year.
Jools confirmed that Zoe was right, and that River’s birth did not feel like the end.
“I really do, I really do but I’ve just had three miscarriages since then, and a recent one three weeks ago,” said Jools.
“I’m thinking … and I’m thinking ‘No,’. I dunno. I do want to, but I’ve got to mentally check that it’s a good idea to do.”
The homewares designer admitted that her age is playing a huge factor in her decision on whether to try to make her motherhood dream come true.
“And also physically because I am 45 as I always say, nearly 46. So it’s a little bit dodgy,” she confessed.
The couple know they have been blessed with five healthy children, but Jools “pines” for a sixth.
Jamie has spoken openly about his family in the past, saying that he hoped River was the last, but when it comes to wife Jools, Jamie is all support.
“Jamie is still up for it, kind of … not really,” she laughed. “I haven’t got long, maybe another year and then I really will just shut that chapter off because I am very happy and I am pretty full up at the moment as it is.”
But like so many mums, that feeling of being finished is eluding Jools right now.
“But just that little baby, it’s a terrible thing to keep wanting something and you can’t help it.” she admits.
“I went to see the doctor the other day and he said, ”How are you mentally?’ and I thought about it and I went: ‘Well, this is the fifth one now,’ I had two before River, and they’ve been early ones, the last two have been at 6 ½ weeks.
“So I just feel … I’m really good at going ”Right, I’m pregnant but it won’t work so I’m just going to carry on,’ whilst everyone gets really into it and I have really learnt to not because I’m kind of not very positive about it.”
Jools has suffered three miscarriages since youngest son, River’s arrival in 2016.
Jools has a close relationship with her own mother, but admits she didn’t tell her about the last miscarriage.
“I did have a pretty dangerous one, I think it was my second one which was really dangerous for myself so my family don’t want me to do it again,” said the mum-of-five.
“They think ‘You’ve got five, you’ve got healthy children, just be grateful.'”
With the UK being in lockdown, Jools was worried about upsetting her family when they wouldn’t;t be able to see her.
“I understand because my life is more important so I sometimes may not tell the sisters because I don’t want to hurt their feelings, I’d rather just not say because they’ll be worried about me specially during lockdown …
“Telling my mum, well, especially because I couldn’t see her, would have really upset her so I kept that quiet. She knows now, but, you know, at the time I didn’t tell her.”
being a mum is all Jools ever wanted to do.
Jools and Jamie share kids Poppy, 18, Daisy, 17, Petal, 11, Buddy, nine, and River, three but her fertility journey was not so straight forward.
Jools was diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome at the age of 17 and before she fell pregnant for the first time, she had to go through intense hormone treatment. However, her and Jamie’s younger children were all conceived naturally.
Jools penned an emotional tribute on International Day of the Midwife in 2018, thanking them for their support.
“We have been so lucky to have been blessed with the most wonderful midwives for each of our 5 children and the 2 little angels we lost. Kind, calm, warm and gentle. When you are scared and at your most vulnerable the squeeze of a hand and a stroke of your head means more than they will ever know.”
Childhood sweethearts Jools and Jamie married in 2000 and 18 years later, they are still in love.
Speaking to Woman, Jamie said, “I like watching Jools get older. I love her more now than I ever have before.”
“I feel like my love widens and I’m enjoying her evolving as a woman, growing older. I like it – her wrinkles have been earned.”
And it’s clear that the feeling is mutual. For their wedding anniversary in June, Jools shared a beautiful tribute to her husband.
“20 years married but together 27 years my first true love… Yes I drive you Bonkers and you probably deserve a medal etc …
“But being with you feels like home (and you know much I love to be at home)!!! I treasure the daily texts you send, you are romantic and constantly positive funny and a dedicated brilliant dad …
“We have created 5 wonderful children and lost our 5 little stars in the sky. Thank you for loving me the way you do…”
WATCH: Jamie and Buddy Oliver in the kitchen together